“O Death, where is thy sting? O Grave, where is thy victory?” (1 Corinthians 15:55 KJV)
I think until Death hits you in the deepest part of your being, we can live in a type of detachment from it… even if you are a Spirit Worker. On December 2nd, Death came calling to take my Grandmother home. My Granny raised me and was the closest thing I had to a Mother figure in my life. To say we were very close would be a massive understatement. Being a Medium/Spirit Worker/Mage, I understand Death and the Eternal Essence that survives. Being a Christian, I understand thru the death of Christ and what it accomplished in removing the “sting” from Death.
When Death hits you at your core, you have a very up close and personal encounter with it, you are confronted with that Eternal Essence in a way that you have never experienced before. Until that moment, we live in a type of detachment from it. Even though we are aware and we know many things about Death, even though we may work with Death thru our prayers and magick, it is not until it hits the core that you are challenged and confronted with what Death is.
Death is a reminder that there is an Eternal Essence out there and within each of us.
Death is a reminder that there is an Eternal Essene beyond Deific statues, pictures, drawings, etc.
Death is a reminder that this Eternal Essence is also very Adversarial. A challenge to our preconceived notions and what we thought we knew, or understood.
Death brings “real” and “authentic” to you in earth shattering ways.
It brings this withdrawal effect from the physical presence of a loved one that is very brutal. We call this process grief. For example: I am struggling to write this. Each word is pure torture. I am having a very hard time focusing on typing and trying to make this piece sound at least semi-intelligent. I stop every couple of words to have another round of crying. Grief is the withdrawal from the physical presence of our loved one. It is the process of attuning ourselves to another way of perceiving our loved one. We are letting go of physical to become aware of Eternal Essence of our loved one. The problem is that we are attached to the physical. Things we can see, hear, touch and experience thru physical bodies. Death challenges us to look outside of the physical box, and to accomplish that we go thru this grieving process.
How do you deal with all of this?
- Grieve to your hearts content, for however long it takes. Grief is healing and a great Teacher of Wisdom to us. Every aspect of our grieving process is necessary for us. Not only does it have a purging aspect to it but it also heals us on many levels. Don’t be ashamed of your pain, your tears, your grieving. Allow them a voice and expression.
- Do rituals and prayers to honor your loved one. I have created a little mini-shrine out of some of my Granny’s things and I have added some of her items to my altar. The items on my altar reminds me of the Eternal Essence with us but the Eternal Essence in Deity. It is also a reminder that compassion and empathy in the work I do at my altar are important factors in what I do there… including extending that compassion and empathy to myself.
- Flowers and dirt from the funeral can be used to create things such as healing talismans. I have a small locket that I am using to create a general healing locket with.
- Give yourself time and plenty of patience and A LOT of LOVE!
Death, when it becomes personal, is one of the greatest Teachers we will have in life. Honor and respect Death and it will reveal much Wisdom to you. If you have any questions, please feel free to message me anytime.
– Raven Nightsong